Bitchin'

H has just really wound me up. Not even about the ultimatum thing, which to be honest, was something that needed saying at some point, and at least she did it tactfully.

When I said I'd speak to S about it, she started saying 'oh we could go for a drink with him after dance and then i'l just disappear to the bar so you two can talk'.

Yes, H, when I was 14 and needed your help to talk to boys, that would have been fine. However, I'm 19. I've grown up a bit. I don't have any issues with going out for a drink or coffee or whatever with S, just the two of us, and breaking the news myself.

I know she was trying to help, but it just irks me that she still seems to think I'm incapable of dealing with men. Ok, so I needed it pointing out to me that it was mean for me to continue hanging onto S and R, but I did realise that, I was just still in denial stage.

Surely its a forgivable offence if you take into account the mitigating circumstances that S was the first guy to show an interest in me that I didn't go to school with, that didn't know anything about me except how I am now? S was the first guy to show an interest in me in years. A took me out because he was forced into it by AH. J and I go back so far I don't even remember it starting.

I was so bowled over by the fact that a gorgeous, sexy, charming guy, one with a sensible job that even my mother approved of that I kinda lost track of the fact that we don't have much in common beyond H and Spain.

Who wouldn't be flattered by a bloke like S texting them constantly telling them they were sexy? I thrived on the attention.

I didn't count on meeting R. He didn't figure in my plans for a hassle-free summer romance with S before I left for the North.

Now I've got it sorted in my head. I want R. I'm falling for R, big time. I got myself into this 2-bloke mess, I'm quite capable of getting myself out of it.

H isn't one to talk, anyway. I don't think I'd have failed to notice that M was a whore.