I love my boyfriend....

The day after Pre-Spain Drinkies (2), H and I were at the pub as normal. It sounds like I'm out every night painting the town red, but honestly, this was one crazy fortnight. It's not normal. I'm still recovering from sleep deprivation...

Anyway, H got a text from S saying he was coming to take us out, and had R with him. Cue H and I getting very excited, then horrified as we realised neither of us had perfume, make up, mints, hairbrush, etc.

I missed the look on J's face when R walked in. Apparently it was a mixture of jealousy and fury.

We went for a drink at 'our' bar, and then when we went to move on to a different bar, we realised that most places in town had shut. So we ignored the normal option (give up, go home) and instead did this.

Drove to Tesco to buy a DVD, wine, vodka, cherryade, cookies, Doritos, dip and Ben & Jerrys ice cream. Then drove to S's to watch the DVD while consuming everything else we'd bought. There's something surreal about eating Phish Food at 2am while watching Blades Of Glory.

But less surreal than realising its four am and that the sun's coming up. So we piled back in the car and drove. Drove for miles, out into the country, looking for somewhere to park to watch the sunrise. Aren't our men romantic?

We missed it. At least, we think we did. We were facing the wrong way, or behind trees, or just totally lost. It was a fun crazy road trip though. By this point it was five. Again, we could have called it a night then.

Nope. We headed over to H's, who lives practically surrounded by fields, grabbed a couple of blankets, and headed to the top of the nearest hill to watch the rest of the sunrise. We saw the first early morning blackbirds. We saw foxes frolicking across the meadows. A sparrowhawk circling the dewy fields. Rabbits leaping from grassy tussock to tussock. And a snail, who tried to invade our blanket. He went for a short flight.

It was so incredibly romantic, to be laying on a blanket watching the dawn chorus with R laying next to me. H and S were a short distance away, supposedly out of sight (although from what S said to me later on msn, he saw plenty of me and R). There's a fantastic video on R's phone of S and H wandering across the field in opposite directions to find bushes to pee in, and then you can hear R and I talking, and then a scream (from me) when S creeps up and puts the snail on R's head. But it captures that morning perfectly. The four of us hanging out companionably, yet having a lovely time with our other halves.

I saw R again the next afternoon (well, I guess it was that afternoon really). He'd had no sleep, having left H's at half six to be at work for seven, whereas H and I had crashed out on her sofa for a few hours. I went to decorate the house. Painting while hungover and sleep deprived is not generally a good idea. L found it entertaining anyway.

And I met R's mum for the second time. I met both his parents the first day I helped out with the house. His mum had turned up while we were wandering in from the garden, arms round each other, and although I wasn't introduced as the girlfriend, it was certainly implied. His Dad may have not immediately approved of me because at the time he appeared I was splattered with paint, as was R. Not much paint had made it onto the walls.

But his mum definitely likes me. Possibly because while R was arguing with her about something, I ignored him and started washing down the brickwork on the front of the house, which she'd been on at him to do for ages. See Mrs R, I'll be the perfect daughter in law. Did I really just say that? Argh.

Basically its all going fabulously. I was round at the caravan last Saturday (because the house is as yet not habitable) and hung out with R and L for a few hours. R and I went for a walk round the village, and then when we got back he asked me out :)

Then we broke up half an hour later.

It wasn't my fault! Much...

L and I were joking about how R was clearly second best because I'd got with S just weeks before. Then I was kidding about, saying R and I were only sharing in Spain because it was either that or two other lads.

R got majorly oversensitive about it. And broke up with me. Mardy arse.

So we both sulked for half an hour or so, while I sat under L's duvet on one sofa and R sat under his duvet on the other. Then much sweet apologising and kissing and making up followed. Which meant he had to ask me out again. Haha.

I am falling in love with R so fast it's unreal. He's the first thing I think of when I wake up, and I don't go to bed without texting him first to say good night. He does the same. The background on his phone is a picture of me on our last date, mucking around wearing a roman helmet at the museum. His profile pic on FB and msn is of the two of us out for a drink. I can't go more than a few days without seeing him. He blew off his man-date with S to hang out with me tonight so we don't spend the entire weekend apart.

We're quite coupley. He feeds me jaffa cakes. I change the settings on his phone. He lets me pack my excess baggage in his suitcase for Spain. I talk about him non-stop at work. His friends know everything about me. I refer to him as 'the boyfriend'. When we're together we're always touching, holding hands, hugging, kissing.

I love how we can go from a really romantic kiss to wrestling on the floor, from holding each other close to tickling, hand-holding to thumb-wars. We just click. He doesn't mind me going off on random tangents in the middle of conversations, whether its about umbrellas or some crazy idea for winning the apprentice. He mocks me for everything, but is quick to say sorry and kiss me if he oversteps the mark.

We have the nuttiest conversations about everything. Tinkerbelle wings on humans, stealing roadsigns, hats, just random crazy ideas about nothing. Occasionally now I'll make a comment when I'm talking to another friend and they'll look at me as if I'm cuckoo, and I have to remember that not everyone understands the conversations R and I have.

I don't care. This is my own little world, and right now it has R in it. I'm trying to be oblivious to the fact that this ends in September, that I wouldn't trust him being so far away and that I wouldn't cope with being away from him for so long. I know we're only been together officially for 6 days, but I can't stop myself.

I want to copy that scene from A Walk To Remember. When she says 'Promise me you won't fall in love with me'....

Man waffle... ignore if wanting to preserve own sanity

Summer seems to be set on roller-coaster mode. One second I'm on top of the world, the next I'm wondering what tripped me up.

Just as I was falling for R, obstacles are appearing. Namely K (not K, my CPN...another K), H's other best friend (complicated? No..). She has apparently fancied R for ages. And was unfortunately with him last night when I was texting him. So she got a pretty good idea of the situation straight off.

Of course she had a slight advantage in knowing I was the enemy a good twenty-four hours before I was aware of this. So she used this time wisely to sow seeds of doubt, and subtly drop into conversation every tiny negative thing she could think of about my personality, friends, past boyfriends, etc.

No wonder I got a frosty reception when I saw her today.

Bitch.

Pointing out to my (potential) boyfriend that there's no way I'll sleep with him because of my faith is just scraping the barrel to piss me off. It's not something I'm ashamed of, and my religious views are stated quite clearly on my Facebook page! I don't keep it a secret!

What bothers me more is that K has now left H a little bit trapped between us. H is being amazing about it so far, passing on everything K says about me, and providing plenty of man-advice... which I can always do with!

I'm trying my darnest to follow the damn advice, but it involves playing it cool and not texting him as often. I'm only allowed to text him if he texts first, and I have to leave a suitable (i.e. >1/2 hour) delay before I reply. Thank goodness for msn... although I'm not allowed to initiate a conversation on that either.

Sigh...

I think I may have just nabbed myself a copy of the video of his last school play. Ok, so it was in exchange for the dvd of my dance school show, but what he doesn't know is that even my parents failed to recognise me in it :) And I can't see any downsides to him seeing me in a leotard and tights.

S hasn't text me since last night. The conversation revolved entirely around what he insists on referring to as 'S-loving'. Hmm... think we need to have words about Spanish sleeping arrangements if things go the way I'm hoping...

Never volunteer, always delegate

My bestest buddy H is away travelling in Asia for several weeks. So guess which numpty volunteered to organise our summer holiday while she was away?

Never again, I swear.

The logistics of dates and people was sorted before I was handed the reins, so it wasn't supposed to be complicated.

Have you ever tried booking flights for eight people? Of which you've never met three of them? Also including two who are away at uni? And one who can't pay until the end of the month? Oh, and one who only needs a flight home as he's meeting us in Spain?

Nightmare.

Perfection in man form

I had my first ever first-date last night. Don't get me wrong, there have been boyfriends, just no first date.

A is perfection in man form. We were introduced by AH, a mutual friend (who I owe muchos drinks to for setting us up!) and after much texting in the intervening two weeks, we met up last night for what was supposedly a quick drink.

Three hours later, we went home, having had a long chat about... pretty much everything. Families, futures, college, school, uni, friends, sport, music, God, America, the definition of 'modern history'. You name it, it was probably discussed.

Of course, at some point he did inevitably discover that I am certifiably crazy and a complete control freak with major OCD issues. So he spent the next hour or so pushing my drink (which he paid for - gotta love a proper gentleman) around the table, knowing that he was driving me nuts.

But he was so adorably gorgeous, sweet, funny, caring, cute, etc, etc, that I could easily put up with the drink-pushing.

I did manage to say the dumbest, blondest things ever. "Do they have camels in Texas?" I don't know, Jelly, why the hell would there be camels in Texas?! I have no idea what possessed me to say something so blatantly stupid.

My only gripe is that he loves to travel, wants to see the world. I want to stay in the UK, permanently. But I guess that's a difference that we can iron out should we ever need to (not that I imagine it will get to that point, given my history of mucking up relationships).

I have no idea what he thought of the evening, other than AH assured me via text this morning (while I was supposedly hard at work in the office) that she'll get all the goss off him tonight, and his so-far lack of texts post-date is just him being 'a typical man, not wanting to seem too keen'.

Or so I hope...

Nyargh!!!!

I'm typing this at the Hometown library, cos the interweb at home steadfastly refuses to acknowledge my laptop's existence.

I had a long, detailed account of my fabulous first date last night, and then - POOF - 'cannot connect to server'.

I hate government provided public services.

"Never mind the patients, this is giving me mental health issues"

^My colleague, trying to figure out if some patient really had a history of psychosis.

I spent all morning with brain-ache. I thought I'd got my head round the Mental Health stuff I'm doing at work, but it seems I haven't. Of course, I pick the week that my supervisor is on holiday to become a doofus.

It doesn't help that the full extent of my medical knowledge on this consists of personal experience and google.

But it was a great way to spend four hours today, looking like I was working really hard but actually just reading through patient's notes. I think I've perfected the art of looking busy.

So the product of four hours work? Three emails sent out, 4 pages of notes written, and one quarter-hour meeting with a colleague to try and decipher the damn thing.

Meaning the most productive thing I've done all day is watching Ashley Tisdale vidoes on YouTube.

Engage brain before opening mouth

I actually spoke to Prince Harry (aka F2 Dr) today. Like, actually held a conversation without stuttering, stumbling over my words or blushing. Even I'm shocked.

We talked about nursing clinics.

At no point did we discuss movies, music, university, specialties or how he likes his coffee. You know, the important stuff. We discussed nursing clinics.

Which is why I am now working my way steadily through a dairy milk and an iced caramel macchiato. I do not care that it will make me fat. Calories will heal the pain of my stupidity.

Despite the fact that I have worked at our surgery for damn near nine months, I told him that there were no nursing clinics on that afternoon. He was a tad surprised, considering that he'd driven in specifically to observe one and that it was on his timetable.

Was there a nursing clinic that afternoon? You bet your ass there was. There were three. Three nursing clinics, that I was mysteriously oblivious to despite spending all morning staring at the appointment system.

I felt like a numpty.